The results
Mostly A’s — Real plans, real effort. This is what effort looks like when it’s real: a day, a place, a booking made before the day itself. Don’t audit it for flaws. Offer specifics back and watch how easily it stays easy.
Mostly B’s — It’s always his sofa. You’ve never been taken anywhere because being seen isn’t part of this for him. Offer one specific daytime plan, out of his flat. What comes back is the whole conversation.
Mostly C’s — Booked at the last minute. You’re the plan he makes when nothing better lands. Offer one day, a week out. A yes-or-no question can’t be answered vaguely, which is exactly why it works.
Mostly D’s — Never where he’d be seen. Forty minutes out of town isn’t romance, it’s distance management. Suggest somewhere in his own neighbourhood and watch what he does with it.